that is all

Regarding Barack Obama and the Democratic National Convention

( Cut for sappiness and optimism in the face of great adversity )

Author: everagaby
Title: Grin and Bear It (Woodlake: An Interlude)
Series: Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles
Pairing: Derek/Sarah
Rating: Adult
Warnings: Through the end of Season 1
Notes: I would like to thank my beta, who would prefer to remain anonymous, but does actually exist, and not in an invisible rabbit sort of way.
Summary: Kitten sweaters, town gardens, and Parent Teacher Conferences: Derek Reese’s own personal hell.

( They don't talk about it. )

So HP has Oracle again. Apparently the new hard drive that they sent me might have been the wrong model, or the discs that they sent were wrong. Either way the wireless didn't work, and they had no clue, and so they now have my computer. In addition, they sent me an e-mail saying that they didn't get my old hard drive back (even though I sent it over a week ago) and that they're planning to charge me. For those of you playing along at home, this is the fourth time since November.

This is me, firmly deciding that my next computer is going to be a Mac. And also that I'm going to become a crazy rich billionaire one day who can take down HP, salt the ground that they were built on, and dance and dance and dance on its ashes, and all of it will just be called eccentricity.

What I'm wondering is, did I torture a Ferbi in a past life? Dissect a toaster? Insult a pacemaker's mother? This might end up being some sort of strange fic in the next few weeks. That I will write on paper. And copy. In triplicate.

Also? I need a WTF icon. Donations are welcome.

So, okay, I'm willing to admit that this has not been my year. Between family problems, health problems, and computer problems I'm completely prepared to write off 2008 as bad luck. The truth of the matter is that I'm trying to tough it through, because the one thing I refuse to do is bitch and whine and wait for people to stumble over themselves to pet my hair and make it better. I've made an executive decision to be independent, to take care of myself, and to be stoic in the face of continual disappointment.

Last night I hit a wall. My computer, which has been in and out of repair since November (it's barely over a year old) suffered massive disc failure last night. In short, the hard drive failed. HP is sending me a new hard drive to put in myself which, what the hell people? Also, they do not offer recovery services. I would be fine with all of this, but I have one major problem - my recovery drive has not been updated for over a month. This means that the data that I had on my computer for the show I'm stage managing (over 20 hours of real-time work) is gone. My new resume is gone. All of my photos of May Day, Graduation, Boston, and my time here in San Francisco are gone. I know what you all are saying - this is my fault, I'm the moron who doesn't back everything up immediately, this is karma and you should suck it up and deal. I can't. I have reached a point where I cannot have another thing like this happen to me and just deal with it. I'm tired of brushing off having my computer gutted and returned to me. I'm tired of shaking myself apart worrying about my dead grandmother, my sick uncle, my seizing aunt. I can't be okay with any of this any more.

So I'm asking for help. I'm going to a hard drive recovery place and seeing what they can get off of my laptop before I return the broken drive to HP. The problem is that the price range on doing so is $200 - $2900.
What I want is, honestly, not worth more than $400, but I doubt that I'll be lucky enough for it to be that cheap. I hate asking for stuff, and I don't want to be that greedy bitch expecting hand outs, but I've seen the wonderful things that people on livejournal, and in fandom, are capable of. I know I'm not anyone, and that I'm not a known name, I'm unimportant, but I'm out here by myself in San Francisco, getting paid $250 a week and trying to live off it and every penny counts. I can't ask for money, or for financial help, but I am asking, now, for support in whatever way people are willing to give it.

I just, I need help right now and I'm not sure where I can get it or how. I hate asking, but I've hit my upper limit and I can't keep doing this alone.

So this time a week from now I'll be eight hours into A.C.T.'s annual Gala. My job for that evening is to herd 65 MFA students and 16 YC (young conservatory) students. If that sounds tedius, then you're probably right. On the plus side, I'll be fed really really good food, while wearing a really really pretty dress, trying not to geek out to overly much in front of our awesome, awesome Gala guests. That said, nothing is scarier than staring down your little black dress for the week leading up to any huge event, especially one where the cost of a table is more than I make in a year, and the guests are the kind of people you see on PerezHilton.com and not getting a latte at your local barrista. Consider me munching on carrots and avoiding chocolate until next Monday.

On to the real reason for this post, I'm hoping to run the Torch 6k next Saturday. The Olympic torch is going to be passing through San Francisco and, because of reasons that are hopefully obvious to everyone keeping up with politics, wherever the torch has been there have been protests and rallies against the current Chinese regime. To quote an article I read recently, "Human rights groups such as Amnesty International and Reporters Without Borders have reported that after China was awarded with the Olympics, repression has increased, instead of improving, as was the hope when giving the Olympics to China." The conditions are worsening instead of getting better, and rallying around what is supposed to be a symbol of unity, justice, and human rights as it is being sent into communist China may not be the fastest way to send a message that what they're doing needs to stop, but I firmly believe that it's a good start. Unless I have a Gala meeting during that time, and I sincerely hope I don't, I will be strapping on my running shoes and registering for the 6K run/walk happening that afternoon.

Without further ado, I would like to introduce you to someone that hasn't been here for a while:


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This is Mr. Soapbox. I would have given him a funny hat and a grimace, but my graphics skills are just not that good. Now that Mr. Soapbox has been pulled out, I am going to stand on him, wave my hands in an overdramatic fashion and point you towards this website: Global Human Rights Torch Relay.

If you're in the Bay Area, or in any other area that will be seeing the torch soon, or if you're interested in supporting the cause in any way, shape, or form, please click that link. It's not the most informative website, but it does contain links to other sites, as well as information on where the torch has been, and where it is going. It amazes me to see how much support there has been in other countries. It's a cause that should be rallied around, and every person who runs, walks, or helps out makes a difference. Read what they have to say. Attend if you can, and offer support if you can't. Me, I'll be hitting the pavement every day this week so I'm ready for the 6k, and spreading this link like the plague.

Now that I've said my piece, me and Mr. Soapbox will go away now, at least until Saturday.

I'm not sure if it's the fog horn that isn't actually a fog horn, because they got rid of that years ago and then the neighborhood petitioned to put something in that sounded exactly like a foghorn because of stupid nostalgia, or if it's Mrs. Lee, my crazy crazy landlady, and her vibrating bed, of it it's the creaking sounds of Jeff, my master tenant, being awake, but OH MY GOD I WANT TO SLEEP SO BAD I'M USING CAPS LOCK AND ITALICS AND BOLDING AND WHY ARE HUMANS THIS DUMB???

seperis is having a Yay For Sex Toys Fest for the legalization of sex toys (finally) in Texas. The whole post can be found here.

I posted comment porn, because I cave to peer pressure like some cheap extra from Degrassi: The Next Generation. I might expand this later, not quite sure yet.

Title: December in Sodom
Author: everagaby
Rating: Oh so very Adult
Summary: It wasn't the first time they'd done this.
Notes: Title taken from The Marquis de Sade's The One Hundred and Twenty Days of Sodom. December was the month of "complex passions."

( How many people does it take to change a lightbulb in a LORT-A Theater during tech? )

Note: blessedly NOT based on a true story, but entirely possible considering that I have to stare at the piece of bread on the ground and wait until our SM can page a stagehand to come and pick it up, even though it's one inch away from my left foot.

So it's 1:24 on a Thursday, and on stage Jack and Steven are currently rounding out the last page and change of Sc. 1. It's a Student Matinee (SMat) day, which means loud responses from a theater full of sugared-up little punks. The thing that amazes me the most is that they seem so rapt by a play that I'm still trying to get my head entirely around. Since I don't have anything to do, not really, until the Scene 2-3 transition I figured now was a good time to catch up on my life.

( Cut for the inanity of my life, also for length. )

So it's been a month from hell, and I'm holding my breath for the next 48 hours in some semblance of a prayer that it'll be over, over, over.

I'm not much in the mood for chatty update, so I'll give the rundown.
-Computer broke (HP still has it, three weeks and change later)
-Screwed up my ankle running (it's better now, mostly)
-Grandmother died (it's...not surprising, more upsetting since she was my last grandparent than anything else. I lost all respect for her a long time ago, but she was still, in many ways, a part of me)
-Couldn't afford a ticket to travel East to her funeral (again, not surprising, I'm a few utility bills away from debating whether I really need both kidneys, and pricing one on eBay)
-Found out my Uncle is getting exploratory heart surgery (he should be in recovery as we speak. All I know is that it's hopefully nothing more than an exploratory catheter, but I can't say for sure.)

So, yeah. Still alive, and currently living by my own shiny little motto:
Under pressure you either crumble or are solidified.

I resolve to be a fucking diamond.

Which Discworld Character are you like (with pics) created with QuizFarm.com

You scored as Carrot Ironfounderson You are Captain Carrot Ironfounderson of the City Watch in the greatest city on the Disc – Ankh-Morprok! A truly good natured, honest guy, who knows everyone, and is liked by all. Technically a dwarf, but only by adoption. You’d rather not be reminded that you are the true heir to the throne, but that does explain why people naturally follow your orders… Carrot Ironfounderson 75% Commander Samuel Vimes 63% Gytha (Nanny) Ogg 63% Lord Havelock Vetinari 56% Esmerelda (Granny) Weatherwax 50% The Librarian 50% Death 38% Rincewind 38% Cohen The Barbarian 31% Greebo 31%

So, my Bryn Mawr webmail expired. For some reason this feels huge, or important, or something. I don't know why, it just does. Thoughts?

...as done between bouts of productivity at work, because there is no internet access at home.

...well, no internet access yet, but that will assuredly change soonish.

...really, really soon I hope because, damn do I miss playing WoW.

( ...shut up, I'm not that much of a dork. )

Sekrit message to seperis:

Rodney!bird = perspective! BE NOT ASHAMED.

I know I have to update lj to indicate that: a) I am alive, b) Gallathea is finished and went well, c) the surgical excision of my birth mark/potential melanoma went well, and d) plans for California continue to be nebulous.

That aside, I felt the need to put in my two cents regarding the current livejournal crackdowns. Note you, this is not comprehensive, nor is it meant as a manifesto. Instead it's my reaction to the seemingly drastic strikethrough.

First, and most important, I feel the need to state that implementation of the Miller Test in order to prevent or at least limit the creation and public distribution of exploitative works, specifically child pornography, is a noble idea. That said, a noble idea is often the most difficult to implement. I already know that I'm shooting myself in the foot by making this comparison, but the difference between idealism and implementation is the difference between the noble idea of communism, sharing equally among all people regardless of class or background, and the implementation thereof. The curse lies not in the honorable idea, but in the unfortunate nature of mankind to go to extremes, especially in situations of control or power.

While the sentiment behind Strikethrough 2007 is noble, the way that these new rules have been stated creates a vast umbrella under which many sundry comments, stories, and even communities can be thrown. It's the grey area created by such an endeavor that causes the double edged sword of doing what's right in taking down child pornography while at the same time doing exactly what's wrong in taking down your average Harry Potter fanfic writer. That brings about an entire debate regarding the sentiment of freedom of speech and the actuality thereof that I won't enter in to here, simply because it's been done much more eloquently in several different places.

What I'm instead taking the time here to talk about is the nature and evolution of fandom, and of our mediums of communication. I remember EGroups being bought out by Yahoo Groups, and the slow but inevitable move from lists to easily accessible personal spaces such as livejournal. I saw the fandom migration away from having a single public posting board for multiple members to the potential for a semi-private space to post your own works. Fandom has evolved in order to accomodate the individual in addition to groups. This evolution at first seemed to me to be cyclical, the burst of potential freedom a new space allows followed by the negative backlash that failed expectations always engenders. Instead it now seems to me to be linear. The backlash and restrictions of a space will always cause us to seek out new mediums with which to speak. We move from point to point, 'zines to groups to communities. The only question I have is what the next point will be.

This is only fascinating to intellectualize to a point. That point comes when the general umbrella of new policy forces a person to rethink what they had originally posted as harmless statements, fanfic, or original prose. The moment that we have to backpedal and rethink just how close all of our decisions and writings come to towing the line is the moment when things have gotten out of hand. We shouldn't have to go back and privatize stories that we believe to be on the dubious border where an interested party might reach out a hand and pull us into the dark and dubious land of strikethrough.

I now find myself on the precipice of another fandom exodus, a mass migration to avoid the Noble Ideas of livejournal. Make no mistake, I'll be the one passing out blankets and muffins to weary travelers as they leave, making sure to get their forwarding addresses and come visit on weekends and holidays, making sure to call and write and pray that we don't loose too many to the shuffle and bustle of relocation. In the meantime the way we have to rethink what we've posted pre-prohibition, where exactly the line is between Harry Potter and kiddie porn, all my expectations and disappointments can be summed up in this simple statement: we need a fucking Livejournal Grandfather Clause.

Title: Downward Facing Dog
Author: everagaby
Pairing: John/Rodney, implied John/OFC
Rating: NC-17
a/n: Written in part while I was attempting not to die during a Bikram class last summer.
Summary: ( When John was 26 he had a girlfriend how did yoga. )